Who am I?

So here we sit... I'm happily typing away, the click clack of keys under my fingers, while you, whoever you are, sit in front of your computer stopping here to read my blog. Well welcome. This is the first installment of my blog "Heaven in her Headlights and Hell on her Heels." Chances are some of you reading this know my life's story... each twist and turn on the road that has brought me to this place.... to this night.... to this blog. Maybe some of you have no idea who I am... stick around and I'm sure you'll get to know me. I see the world in a light that many people don't and have decided that maybe I should share my eyes with you.... so here it goes...

I recently joined a new church and cannot even begin to express to you how blessed I feel to call it my home. Until this past Sunday my involvement with this church has been strictly based to one group, however, this week I was given the opportunity to use the gifts God has given me as part of our worship service. It was such a blessing to be there performing to my audience of ONE. But that's not what this blog is about.....

When I was rehearsing the music minister of my church asked me a simple question... she said "So Sarai... tell me about yourself." Such a simple question, but I found it very difficult to answer... How do I boil myself down to just a few sentences? How do I make my persona come alive with a few words? All I could say was "There's alot to tell."

I'm not shy, I have nothing to hide... but a thousand different words sprang to mind.... I'm a dreamer, a medic, a clown, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a divorcee, an abuse survivor, a pk, a tatt'd up princess, a professional, an actress, a songwriter, a poet, a strong independent woman, and a scared little girl.

I am so much in one small package... and it's been weighing on my mind for the past two days. Who do I say I am?

Jesus asked that to disciples once and they answered him "Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets." "But what about you?" he asked. "Who do you say I am?" Simon Peter answered, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." Jesus replied, "Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven. And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it.I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven."

Here's what blows my mind.... Peter.... he knew... Jesus was THE CHRIST... that's a big deal... and yet this was the same Peter who later called out and asked Jesus to let him walk across a stormy sea to stand by His side and then doubted and fell in. The same Peter who hid in a crowd as they crucified his Christ and denied Jesus not once, not twice, but three times. This lowly fisherman was the man on whom Jesus built his church. Wow.... how good does that make you feel?

So here's my answer... I'm a daughter of THE CHRIST. I'm far from perfect... I have a lot of growing up to do. I am an unworthy recipient of a grace I will never understand and I will strive everyday to be a stone in the church.... to be used by God...

So.....who do you say you are?